Fall of Vrazuk

Grash'Nok's Bedroom

The group finally came to the end of the passageway where they found what they believed to be Grash’Nok’s bedroom. Two guards were in the room complaining about guard duty when Sindri slid the door open and did a massive cursebite.

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Grash'Nok's Castle

After looting the armory, the group waited momentarily at the armory’s exit for the guards to pass, but Sindri became impatient and attacked the guards as they passed the armory. The rest of the group joined in the fight, and they made quick work of the five guards and lieutenant.
Lucien went straight-away to the apothecary to stock up on goods while Unk and Sindri proceeded into the castle.

The group entered the castle unhindered, took the door beside the throne, went upstairs, and found a waiting room. In the waiting room was a painting with peep holes for spying on those in the waiting room. The group teleported into the secret passageway behind the painting, and resumed exploring the castle. They found four guards were waiting for them in the next room. Sindri attack and killed three from behind the wall while the others made quick work of the last.

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Shadowmeade

While traveling on the group encountered a smelly scraggly man who collapsed in the middle of the road. Sindri quickly stopped the cart, and Unk tumbled towards the front of the cart, knocking his head on the front of the cart. He complained about being woken up just as his dream was starting to get really good. Sindri and Lucien went to check on the old man. They found him breathing, but barely conscious. They gave the man some water and a bite to eat. When they asked where he was headed, he replied, “I am just a simple wanderer. I travel here and there depending on the good will of strangers to survive.” Lucien laughed.

As the conversation continued, the man began asking about what they knew about the origins of the universe. They said they had heard of the All Mother but little more. He told them that in the beginning the Planar Chaos was inhabited by three powerful beings. The All Mother, named Muloa, was a great dragon who created and ruled the world we live in now. Another great dragon, Dunicr, was good and ruled the Astral plane. There was also an evil dragon, Evuxek, who ruled the abyss. He said these travelers were the first to hear these names in eons, and he foretold of a great nexus in their future that would result in a great war. His final words were, “The fate of the world will rest in your hands”, before he disappeared into thin air.

The remainder the trip was relatively quiet as the adventurer’s pondered the news that they had just heard. During Unk’s shift, the group arrived at the town. Shadowmeade turned out to be the bustling metropolis they expected with busy streets filled with merchants hawking their wares and stores of all kinds. The city was built into a mountain side and divided into a three tiers with a few small camps comprised of riff-raff and thieves outside the town.

The population of the first tier, Pariah, was primarily peasantry. It was the area to visit for cheap inns, women, beer, and the black market. Pariah also had by far the highest crime rate. The next tier, Vaishya, was primarily skilled workers and merchants. It was much cleaner than Pariah, and had considerably higher end stores with armor, weapons, and the like. The highest tier, Brahm, was home to the aristocracy. There, a wealthy traveler could stay in a fine hotel, purchase amazing jewelry, or a clean woman.

After asking around, the group continued on their way to Brahm to put their names on the tournament’s roster. With a bit of careful persuasion, the group was able to find their names already on the roster and that the tournament would be held in three days. At that time all the details would be revealed, but currently no one knew much about the nature of the tournament. With a bit more persuasion, the adventurers were able to extract the location of Grash’Nok’s castle.

Sindri sent Tilia inside Grash’Nok’s castle to scout for guards and other interesting information. Grash’Nok’s castle is built entirely of black stone with red draperies covered in evil symbols. The courtyard contained a blacksmith, armory, and various stores required to sustain a siege. The entrance to the foyer was followed by a long hallway. At the end of the hallway was a large extravagant throne room, with red tapestries adorning the dark walls. The throne was made of a charred wood set into a dark nebulous stoneworkish seatery. Guards are posted all along the entrance to the castle.

Unk distracted the guards while Sindri teleported into the castle and raised the gate enough for the others to enter. The group then snuck into and looted the armory.

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Departing Brookbarrow

As the adventurers left town and the townsfolk wished them well on their journey, a teenager approached them beaming with pride. He told them of how he would be honored to compete with them in the tournament in Shadowmeade, and he was excited to bring honor to his late father’s longsword. Sindri began discussing the asked what his training was in. The group quickly realized that the kid had no idea how to handle himself in a fight. Unk, as Zymac, swiftly shattered the poor kid’s dead father’s sword, and chuckled, “I guess you won’t be going to Shadowmeade after all, eh?” as a shard of the sword spun into the crowd. The man was very badly hurt, but Lucien was able to quickly bandage the wounded man.

The group spent the rest of their morning in R&D of a BoHWLoco (Bag of Holding Wind Locomotive) and finally created a working prototype. The basic premise of the machine’s propulsion was to run about with a bag of holding gathering an amount of wind into the bag. The bag would then be secured to a light wagon, and as the wind was released, the wagon would be propelled forward. To maintain speed, several bags were placed on the front to gather wind. As the driving bag exhausted its supply, it would be exchanged with a freshly charged bag from the front of the wagon. The rear bags are placed inside boxes on turntables to allow for directional controls. The driver controls the cart’s speed by willing the air out of the bag of holding at an appropriate rate.

With the cart working functioning properly, the group decided to search for the dragon’s lair. However, after many failed attempts at making a path through the ice and extinguishing the forest fire, they gave up and decided to travel to Shadowmeade.
With evening approaching, Sindri took the first shift at the wheel, and began moving at a lightning fast pace — for a gnome. He was enjoying the breeze on his face and watching the trees whip past while the other two manned the intake bags. Unk began grumbling about grandpa’s slow pace, and Sindri responded that he had invested a lot into this cart and wanted it to be treated well.

Night came soon, and Sindri was having difficulty seeing so he made himself a bed in the center of the cart. Unk grinned widely as he eagerly took his turn at the reigns. He put both hands on the BoH drives and the cart jumped off at a rather fast clip. As he gained confidence in his maneuvering abilities, he bumped the speed up a little more, and the cart seemed to be floating from bump to bump rather than rolling on the ground. Sindri was frequently woken up by a hard bump knocking him from his bed. He would yell at Unk and go back to sleep, but it made no difference.

After Unk finishes his shift, the group stops and inspects the cart for damage, and finds that Unk’s joyriding has cracked the rear axle. With a bit of teamwork, the group was able to replace the axle and continue on their way with Lucien at the helm, pushing the cart at a more reasonable pace. Unk took a nap and Sindri took over the brakes.

The group was happily traveling along when they came around a blind curve to be confronted by a group of unsavory individuals who had blockaded the road. The cart came to a screeching halt just before reaching the vagabonds’ caltrops. Some heated words were exchanged, but Lucien finally concluded that these were some interesting individuals that we should get to know better.
While the arguing ensued, Unk morphed into an attractive female human and jumped up behind Sindri wearing nothing but a slinky nighty. Having not seen an attractive woman in months, the pirates began drooling all over themselves. Sindri, always slow to recognize Unk, believed the woman was a pirate intruder, and he told the harlot to get out of his cart and tell him what she’d done with Unk! After some discussion, the pirates agreed to allow the travelers to pass if they could keep the wench. Sindri gladly agreed and kept moving though he was still very concerned about Unk’s whereabouts.

Unk stayed behind with the pirates while the other two continued around a corner and waited. A battle soon ensued and the true nature of the pirates was revealed they were VAMPIRATES! The captain managed to dominate Unk for the majority of the battle but was never able to force him to do more than walk around. The battle ended with Lucien firing a final arrow into the captain.

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Die kobolds die

The group runs from one end of the town to the other laying waste to the oncoming kobold army. After annihilating the first two waves of kobolds, they are confronted by a pair of young green dragons from the West gate. Sindri was able to make quick work of his kobold soldiers using his mangina attack. Unk easily took the brunt of the attack due to his armor protecting him from their poison. Another dragon came from the East gate.

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We own the night

Unk, as Barglurg, visited a local taylor to purchase some assorted clothing. Some if it was fairly common, some formal, but by far the most curious purchase was some dresses and night-time-fun clothes for his “lady.” He also managed to secure quite a deal on the purchase by using his Vrazuk influence.

Meanwhile, Lucien visited the local Vrazuk HQ, to meet with Barglurg’s second in command. After they discussed how incompetent Barglurg is and his strange behavior as of late, they struck a deal that Lucien would aid him in taking out Barglurg as part of the chosen one’s task of removing the weakest syndicate members.

Later that night, Sindri returned from looting the local jewelery store to collect the reward from the jeweler’s competitor. The store keeper was initially unimpressed at the bag of holding that Sindri carried in, but his eyes grew wide and his jaw dropped as the bag’s contents covered the countertop and spilled into the floor. After some discussion over the payment, the shopkeeper said he could only pay Sindri a mere 250,000gp today, but they could meet in the morning to pay the rest. Sindri left the store, smiling from ear to ear due to the ridiculous amount of money he was carrying, and the good deed he believed he had accomplished in shutting down the corrupt jewelry store.

As Sindri was looking for a nice bar in which to celebrate his fortune, he encountered Lucien on his way from Vrazuk HQ. The two excitedly exchanged stories of their recent adventures and how the town is terribly afraid of them. The two continue walking and exchanging stories when they bump into Unk, in Barglurg form. Although Lucien immediately recognizes him, Sindri is terribly afraid of the syndicate thug until Lucien fills him in.

The group ducked into a dark alley to begin making their final plans before leaving the town when they heard a jingling, rustling sound followed by some grunting. Lucien and Sindri went to investigate and found the shopkeeper trying to leave town with his inventory as well as the huge haul that Sindri had just brought him. Sindri was perturbed to see his cohort but assumed he must have a valid explanation. Lucien quickly recognized that the man was trying to skip town with all of the loot. He pulled out his bow and trained it at the shopkeeper’s head. The two had a heated discussion about what should be done with the remaining jewelry and Lucien eventually convinced the shopkeeper that it would be in his best interest to return to the store and leave the goods to Lucien.

Lucien and Unk discussed Lucien’s deal with the second in command, and the two worked out a plan to lure him in and assassinate him. Lucien gave the call sign that was intended to alert the second lieutenant as to when he should attack Barglurg, and he quickly rushed to the scene and confronted Barglurg. While the two were arguing over who deserved to run the syndicate, Lucien used twin strike to quickly drop the second lieutenant.

Barglurg toted the thug’s corpse back to Vrazuk HQ, and used it to convince them that they were under attack from the Summerbridge branch. He then gave them orders to gear up and head toward Summerbridge. The group met up afterward and had a good laugh at the syndicate’s expense before they turned in for the night.

When they tried to leave the next day, they found that the Unk’s forest fire finally reached the town. While attempting to fight the fire, they heard some townsfolk battling on the opposite side of town. When they reached the fight, they realized it was a group of kobolds attacking the town. They quickly killed them, but noticed two more groups quickly approaching.

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Laptops are like dragons

Suddenly, an ancient laptop teleported in front of Unk, making him flat-footed and unleashed a psychic attack. Unk, being weak against this attack, fled in terror until his heart finally exploded out of sheer fright. Lucien, seeing his comrade’s bloody end, starts to unleash split the tree upon the horrid beast; however it senses the attack and unleashes a instant counterattack: Horrors of Old. Lucien lost his sanity and unleashed split the tree upon Chocolate instead, killing her instantly.

Hearing the screams of the crowd, Sindri starts heading that direction, curses the target and unleashes eldritch blast. The laptop emits a sinister laughter sound effect while it amplifies the attack and redirects the attack to Lucien, obliterating him instantly. Sindri, knowing that he cannot defeat this foe, attempts to teleport away. Unfortunately, the laptop senses this and redirects his teleport in a bag of holding, where Sindri begins to suffocate.

The laptop then starts an unknown dark ritual summoning the forces of “Dell” and “WinXP”. Sensing the world is in peril, the mastermind decides he must intervene to balance the world. Unfortunately, the binary aura of creature hits the master, and forces all his rolls to be 1s. After a few thousand level 1 orcs and kobolds have appeared from out of nowhere and instantly were slaughtered, leaving only poo stained leather armor on the ground, the ancient laptop finishes the ritual. The ancient forces of Dell and WinXP combine with the ancient laptop, sending a blast so powerful, it penetrates the magical apple armor of the world’s master, and causes his mind to shatter

The foul beast cackles in glee at his victory, knowing no one could tame it. Just as the world is about to be destroyed, a bright blue blast radiates from the beast, freezing it in it’s tracks. The blue light continues to gain intensity, causing anyone that looks at it to instantly go blind, start bleeding from the eyes, and begin dying a horrible, blue death! The power of the light eventually became so strong that the coersion of space and time eventually shatter, leaving only a bright blue abyss.

Lucien wakes up and goes to the predetermined meeting place, however Sindri is nowhere in sight and “Gharash” is wearing leather armor and a sword without a shield….
Laptops are like Dragons… the more ancient, the harder it is to win…

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The Mysterious Chocolate

Lucien hears rumors that the three chosen ones are in town. Everyone is afraid of them, and they are afraid of them because they destroyed the Summerville Syndicate. Sindri makes a deal with a local jeweler to steal goods from his competitor. Chocolate asks around to learn more about the syndicate, how to join, how she can meet Barglurg. Chocolate confronts Unk as Barglurg:

C: Are you married?
U: No, I have several concubines… companions if you will.

Unk wonders wtf is going on.

U: Are you looking for some companionship for the night?
C: I’m used to companionship as far as family and friends and such so I’m looking for a new adopted family. But not just for a night. I want several nights. Maybe every night.
U: We can discuss things. We can go down here to the bar and discuss what we can over a couple of drinks.
C: That sounds wonderful.
They walk to the bar, get a pint, and sit in a secluded area.
U: So. Drink up it’s all on me. What do you have in mind?
C: I’m pretty sure I made that clear already. I’m kind of just looking for a new group to travel with. I have many MANY skills.
U: So what do you specialize in?
C: I would usually take my time, but you’re so powerful and all. You could probably figure out what my skillsets are. I’m so small… and flexible… nimble… and acrobatic… ambidextrous. Why don’t you give me a chance to prove myself?
U: Oh yeah. I’ll give you an opportunity to see what you can do for me.
C: I’m here to serve. I just want to be accepted.
U: Let me get another drink real fast.
Unk quickly chugs his pint
U: Ok, let’s get out of here. I’m ready to go.

Later in Unk’s office:

U: So. Show me what you got.

Chocolate reaches into her bag and pulls out her thief’s tools and begins explaining how good she is at picking pockets.

U: WTF?
C: Oh my other skills. I’ll show you acrobatic skills.
She begins flipping around the room, swinging around on the ceiling fan, and such.
U: Oh, I think there’s been some miscommunication here.
C: Oh, well, part of my other skill set, I can combine my skills. I’ll show you my lock-picking skills.

Chocolate retrieves some handcuffs from her bag of tools.

U: That’s what I’m talking about!
Chocolate handcuffs him to the bed.
C: Now now…

Chocolate reaches behind her back, retrieves a dagger, and plunges it into his heart, activating her shadow powers. Shadows form all around him and claw at his life force. He quickly morphs his hands into nubs, pulls them from the cuffs, yanks the dagger from his chest and calls his sword to him.

U: What the hell are you doing?
C: WTF did you do with your hands and how did you get your sword:
U: Why did you attack me?
C: Nothing personal. Are you or are you not Barglurg?
U: What do you mean?
C: Do you not understand what I’m saying?
Unk stabs her dagger into the wall.
U: Why are you trying to kill me.
C: Nothing personal. I was hired to kill barglurg.
U: Fine. you want to know the truth.
Unk polymorphs into Chocolate
U: I killed him this morning and took his place to take his place as the leader of the syndicate.
C: O… k…
U: You have a couple options. We could have it out right here.
C: I have no need to now.
U: I’m used to it. Women stab me in the heart anyways.
C: So where is his body?
U: I uhh… shattered it. But if you’re looking to get at the syndicate, the big boss is in Shadowmeade, and there’s a tournament with great prizes. Plus, I think you kind of owe me for the stabbing.
C: To be fair, you were impersonating a syndicate boss. This puts me in an odd position for collecting my money though. You’ll be walking around dead.
U: Well, tomorrow I’m causing the entire local syndicate to attack the Summerville syndicate. If I die, I won’t be able to keep the town peaceful. I’ve got a nice longsword you can have though.
C: How long do you plan on staying in this form?
U: As long as it suits me.
C: Well, fine. I did enjoy the chase.
U: Well sucks to be you. I’m done here. You can come with me or not

Unk leaves and heads back to a different room.

Sindri knocked over the jewelry store and made off with the entire inventory.
While Lucien is checking around for equpiment, he notices the half-orc talking to a halfling and they walk off together towards a local bar. He purchases alchemist’s fire and ice and blinding bombs, and some nice arrows.

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Climbing the Crime Ladder

As the group continued on to Brookbarrow, they came across a small group of spriggans, which they fought and killed.

Further along their way, the group came to a clearing in the woods and discovered an abandoned house in the middle of a field of an unknown crop. While searching the house, Lucien noticed a picture frame that is slightly askew. Upon moving it aside, he discovered a safe, which Sindri hastily tried to open, tripping a small trap in the process. The group discovered a nice stash of jewelry and gold pieces in the safe. As they left the house, Unk claimed to have heard Lucien say they should torch the place. So Unk set fire to the house with his sword.

As the group left the house, they encountered a giant bee. Lucien attempted to tame the bee using the smoke from some of the on-fire grass surrounding the house. The group quickly discovered that this was not ordinary grass, but Happy Grass. Lucien finally tamed the bee by getting it high, and Unk quickly attempted to mount the bee. However, Unk’s weight proved far too great for the bee and it promptly fell to the ground. By this time, the fire was spreading fairly quickly, and the group had to move quickly to avoid be consumed in the fire.

Later, they came across a man rushing towards the blaze. Unk took the form of an attractive woman to distract him and find out who he was. It turned out he was a Happy Grass supplier for the syndicate, who was on his way to find the source of the fire. As he tried to continue on his way, Unk knocked him unconscious, and Lucien shot him point blank with his bow to kill him. After traveling a bit further, the group set up camp.

During Unk’s watch, some Brookbarrowians passed by on their way to fight the raging forest fire. On Sindri’s watch, he heard sobbing and went to investigate. He found a tiny wood sprite whose home tree had been burned down in the fire. Sindri vowed to care for her as his familiar until his life takes a new path.

The group finally made it to Brookbarrow. Unk entered through the main entrance with some fellows he had been chatting with. Sindri entered the far entrance as a dwarf, using his hat of disguise, and Lucien waited outside for nightfall.

Sindri first tried to sell their stolen jewelry to the shopkeeper it was stolen from and barely escaped by distracting the shopkeeper and teleporting away from some guards. He changed to a hobbit disguise to avoid being noticed as he went through the town.

Unk traded in his leather armor for hide with the same enchantment. He then took the form of Darryl, the Happy Grass supplier, and proceeded to investigate the whereabouts of the local syndicate boss, Barglurg. Once Unk found him, he infiltrated the syndicate hideout and convinced them that the Brookbarrow Syndicate was under attack by a boss from another town, and they needed to speak privately. Once alone, Unk fought and killed the boss, and took his form. He then disposed of the body (freeze and smash) and told the henchmen to gather the syndicate’s best equipment to prepare for an attack on the syndicate in Summerville.

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Gay Dwarf

Among the spoils from the battle with the Sahuagins was their leader’s headdress, which Sindri determined to have properties that would increase his will. Eager for more power, he hastily placed the item on his head and immediately felt a surge of power. Sindri looked forward to unleashing his new power on his foes and began dreaming of watching their little heads explode as he smote them one by one. Just as he was fantasizing about exploding a red ancient dragon head, he heard bellowing laughter coming from the other two adventurers who were now doubled over and pointing at him. Confused, Sindri looked down to notice that he was somehow wearing a pink tutu. He exclaimed in a loud, echoing, nasally voice, “Ooold Greegggg!!” as he covered his mouth in shock. Sindri hurriedly tried to remove the headdress, but had a difficult time as it was stuck to his head with Sahuagin sliminess.

Just as he removed the headdress, the group heard a bubbling sound coming from the lake and quickly took cover behind some trees. Although slightly wary of the headdress’s effects, Sindri was anxious to test it out so he put it on as ten more Sahuagin warriors emerged from the water. He cursed the nearest one, whose head promptly exploded. Then the two adjacent to him exploded and the next two and so on. Once all the sahuagins on the shore were beheaded, plumes of water began erupting from all over the lake, and the entire lake began to take on a green tinge. As the group realized that Sindri had likely just killed an entire town, they turned to him with wide eyes and quietly mouthed “What. The. Hell?” Sindri shrugged his shoulders, removed the headdress and replied, “Tutu or not. I’m keeping this thing! Let’s hurry to the next town! I’m dying for a shot of bailey’s.”

The group continued towards Brookbarrow and made it to a camp site to rest for the night. They set up their typical alarms, and Unk took first watch. An hour or so in, he noticed some men walking nearby and quickly woke the others. Sindri once again donned the Sahuagin headdress and began sneaking toward Unk in his tutu. He whispered the Feysworn Blessing in Unk’s ear, but instead of changing into a fearsome snakelike monster, he polymorphed into an angry, rainbow colored, sword wielding, dwarf poofball. As the battle continued, the enemy became increasingly troubled that the gay dwarf or tutu gnome might do worse than kick their asses. Finally, Unk froze the last enemy, a hobbit, in ice and began questioning him. The hobbit informed the group that they had been hired by Waggugat and Wagglug from the syndicate in Summerville to track and kill them. He also told them that the syndicate leader in Brookbarrow was Bargurlg before one of Lucien’s bears grew impatient and took the hobbit’s head as a midnight snack.

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